antelopedundee
internet bum
Dave Coots
64 Chevy 409 10.42 129
antelopedundee
internet bum
Dave Coots
64 Chevy 409 10.42 129
antelopedundee
internet bum
A woman, cranky because her husband was late coming home again, decided to leave a note, saying, "I've had enough and have left you...don't bother coming after me" Then she hid under the bed to see his reaction.
After a short while the husband comes home and she could hear him in the kitchen before he comes into the bedroom. She could see him walk towards the dresser and pick up the note... After a few minutes he wrote something on it before picking up the phone and calling someone... "She's finally gone...yeah I know, about bloody time, I'm coming to see you, put on that sexy French nightie. I love you...can't wait to see you...we'll do all the naughty things you like." He hung up, grabbed his keys and left. She heard the car drive off as she came out from under the bed. Seething with rage and with tears in her eyes she grabbed the note to see what he wrote..."I can see your feet. We're outta bread: be back in five minutes."
After a short while the husband comes home and she could hear him in the kitchen before he comes into the bedroom. She could see him walk towards the dresser and pick up the note... After a few minutes he wrote something on it before picking up the phone and calling someone... "She's finally gone...yeah I know, about bloody time, I'm coming to see you, put on that sexy French nightie. I love you...can't wait to see you...we'll do all the naughty things you like." He hung up, grabbed his keys and left. She heard the car drive off as she came out from under the bed. Seething with rage and with tears in her eyes she grabbed the note to see what he wrote..."I can see your feet. We're outta bread: be back in five minutes."
not so crazy beats sweeping those pesky grass clipping
antelopedundee
internet bum
Mother Nature created wind in order to drive shooters nuts and blow our driveways clean.
Dave Coots
64 Chevy 409 10.42 129
Dave Coots
64 Chevy 409 10.42 129
Dave Coots
64 Chevy 409 10.42 129
Mafia
Two Mafia hit men are walking deep into a forest in the middle of the night.
One of them says,"I gotta admit I'm scared out here."
The other replies, "You're scared...?? .... I gotta walk back alone.
Two Mafia hit men are walking deep into a forest in the middle of the night.
One of them says,"I gotta admit I'm scared out here."
The other replies, "You're scared...?? .... I gotta walk back alone.
Dave Coots
64 Chevy 409 10.42 129
Kentucky Derby
Derby winner Medina Spirit's jockey John Velazquez turned down a white house invite today saying, "if i wanted to see a horses ass I would have come in second....
Derby winner Medina Spirit's jockey John Velazquez turned down a white house invite today saying, "if i wanted to see a horses ass I would have come in second....
Nor Cal Mikie
Active member
Bruce Jenner as a woman?? Now THAT's funny right there.
California, where women are women and so are some on the men.
And only in California could he/she get elected Governor.
Where are we going and why are we in this hand basket.
California, where women are women and so are some on the men.
And only in California could he/she get elected Governor.
Where are we going and why are we in this hand basket.
........
Where are we going and why are we in this hand basket.
We're going right down the tracks we've been hand-forging since the 60's and we've boarded the handbasket of our own volition
Actions have consequences.
Inaction is an action
And our kids have learned from watching us.....
A man was being tailgated by a stressed out woman on a busy boulevard. Suddenly, the light turned yellow, just in front of him.
He did the right thing, stopping at the crosswalk, even though he could have beaten the red light by accelerating through the intersection.
The tailgating woman hit the roof, and the horn, screaming in frustration as she missed her chance to get through the intersection.
Mid-rant, she heard a tap on her window and looked up into the face of a very serious police officer. The officer ordered her to exit her car with her hands up. He took her to the police station where she was searched, finger printed, photographed, and placed in a holding cell.
After a couple of hours, a policeman approached the cell and opened the door. She was escorted back to the booking desk where the arresting officer was waiting with her personal effects.
He said, "I'm very sorry for this mistake. You see, I pulled up behind your car while you were blowing your horn, flipping off the guy in front of you, and cussing a blue streak at him. "I noticed the 'Choose Life' license plate holder, the 'What Would Jesus Do' bumper sticker, the 'Follow Me to Sunday-School' bumper sticker, and the chrome-plated Christian fish emblem on the trunk. Naturally, I assumed you had stolen the car."
Dave Coots
64 Chevy 409 10.42 129
10-4 on that...
JerrySharrett
Senile Member
Where are we going and why are we in this hand basket.
-Will Rogers1932
I have a sign on a stick I reach over and cover my passenger window for them to read;
"stop licking the windows and they'll take it off you"
antelopedundee
internet bum
Sven and Ole were driving through the countryside. They stopped and Sven said, Ole, you see that silo? Well I built that by myself, every brick, every stave, every ring; I did it all by myself. And nobody knows or cares.
Awhile later they stopped again. Ole, do you see that barn over there? Well, I built that too. All by myself. Every board, every shingle. I did that all by myself. And do you know what? Nobody knows or cares.
But, you screw just one pig and...........
Awhile later they stopped again. Ole, do you see that barn over there? Well, I built that too. All by myself. Every board, every shingle. I did that all by myself. And do you know what? Nobody knows or cares.
But, you screw just one pig and...........
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