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  1. About $250 and change

    I was telling Jackie how much titanium I had in my body. He looked at me and stated: "You're telling me you are worth more in scrap then you are alive." It was the funniest thing I have heard in a...
  2. Better yet

    I would go with platinum or plutonium. Both are denser then any metal mentioned. Tim
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    Ron Stories

    I have two additions to Ron Stories: The Ron truck fireball episode:
    The reason they had to bail out of the truck was that the back window was a slider and open thus admitting flames into the cab....
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    I want one

    For the great unwashed (including me): What company do you represent? Do you have a web page? Tim
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    Who me?

    All right this does it. If I get any more insults like this heads are gonna roll. Tim
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    I am sorry but my sex life is none of your...

    I am sorry but my sex life is none of your business. Tim
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    Butch, Alas I will not be at the swap meet. I am...

    Butch, Alas I will not be at the swap meet. I am recovering from two spine fractures (and subsequent surgery) I suffered in an auto accident. I will be sitting out this benchrest season but plan on...
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    Heads up!

    Ha! I know that Butch likes to drop burlap sacks of kittens out of airplanes. (Just kidding. I agree with the above quote. However, if he mails me one more dead puppy...). Tim
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    I've been screwed only once

    Dear TrxR, All of my actions except one in 30 years of shooting benchrest have been glued in and not screwed. I personally have had one action come unglued during a match. I have seen two others...
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    Eureka!

    Jerry, The unit you recommended seems to be mainly for safety rather then containing splashing but it gave me a brainstorm about how to design a splash guard much simpler then I originally had...
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    Splish Splash I was taking a bath

    I have a Takasawa 14 x 400 tool room lathe. I want to add a rear splash guard to keep oil off of the shop wall and ceiling behind and above the machine. Any suggestions as to material, who to contact...
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    Quote of the year

    Good one. Question: Why don't zombies eat each other? Tim
  13. Thread: Whoops!

    by Tim Oltersdorf
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    Whoops!

    Texas benchrest shooter Tim Oltersdorf accidentally triggered the development of a black hole in his new garage after a recent move. His wife Teresa describes the series of events that led to the...
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    A little dirt covers a multitude of sins

    You are right. A thick covering of mud would be an aesthetic improvement to some. Tim
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    After the Match

    Dave, Your idea has merit but how about this for an after the match venue: we all get liquored up, doff our clothes and have an NBRSA vs Victoria's Secret models nude mud wrestling match. You supply...
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    Hey, Hey, Hey, Hey!

    Glen, I too am greatly saddened by Bill Cosby's behavior. He was my favorite comedian. He was never political, totally unlike today's comics. He was also a talented actor and I admired him. Fat...
  17. They were right here next to the drinking glasses

    I had hoped to attend but I am in the process of moving. I am about done after packing enough cardboard boxes to house all of Fort Worth's homeless and garage their shopping carts. Wait a minute....
  18. Amazing artifact unearthed from the Pleistocene Benchrest Era

    Most sleeved action rifles are not as desirable as a custom action. The stock has a nice paint job and that will help sell the rifle. The Jewell trigger is pretty standard on this type of rifle. The...
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    A tyrant at work

    FBI intercepts of Terry's e-mails have disclosed that he plans to stifle dissent at the director's meeting the same way he does at home: by brandishing a live black mamba at his protesters. Tim
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    Hold on a minute here!

    I have it on good authority from Maxine Walter's office that Terry Myers sexually abused a large lizard when he was 14 years old. I feel we should postpone Terry "Old lizard abuser" Myer's presidency...
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    Red dust in the morning, shooter take warning

    All smokeless propellants that I know of contain nitric acid in their manufacture. That red dust and acid smell is the nitrates breaking down and releasing nitric acid. Once this happens the powder...
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    An open letter to the universe

    Since it seems to be open letter month in the forum here is my two dinar's worth:
    T-shirts: I love BR t-shirts. I have about 200 pounds worth and wear them everywhere but, please vendors, stop...
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    Save the planet. Recycle.

    Richard, I have several boxes of old benchrest plaques that I have collected over the years. Since my spouse has rejected my idea of covering the wall in our living room with them (to show that she...
  24. "You want to see America? Go to Waffle House." the Big Man

    Rob, I totally understand your aversion to Waffle House. I also had it and avoided Waffle House. Then I was forced by circumstances to eat there 4 days in a row because my friends and ride dictated...
  25. We don't need a wall. We need a minefield.

    14 Canadians! That's not a delegation. That's an invasion. They think they can just waltz in from up north and spread their cultural idiosyncrasies to America. Polite discourse, no gender in...
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